Ep #94: When You’re “Just Not Good at Managing People”

 In Podcast

As a founder, you were never really on the “manager career path.” You never made a conscious decision to be a manager. It’s not that you’re not good at managing people. The truth is you never wanted to manage people and you don’t enjoy managing people. So let me help you sit in that management seat and find a voice in it that you can feel good about.

What you’ll find in this episode:

  1. The five advantages of learning how to manage.
  2. Rule #1 – Don’t hire other people to manage your team until you know how to do it.
  3. The superpowers that every CEO must possess.
  4. All about the upcoming How to CEO program.

Featured on the Show and Other Notes:

  • The next 12-week How to CEO program starts January 20, 2021. Go to howtoceojoin.com to get on the wait list.
    – Classes meet once a week on Wednesdays.
    – No more than 50 people in the class.
    – Then there are office hour coaching sessions where we answer your questions and coach you directly.
    – Register EARLY by December 31, 2020 and immediately get access to a bonus course called Managing Overwhelm for Female Entrepreneurs.
    – We’re also going to do a live mini virtual retreat with Kris on January 2, 2021 that’s all about planning 2021. This is only available to people who register early.
  • If you don’t like the group thing and prefer private, confidential, and personal advisory support, Kris offers private coaching. Ali Brown says it’s like having Kris on the Bat phone! She has two openings for private clients in December 2020.
  • Kris is also doing two virtual strategy afternoons if you’d like to coach with her for 4 hours. If you’re interested, go to krisplachy.com/appointment and schedule time to meet with her team to see if it’s a good fit.
  • What’s your view as you listen to this podcast? Take a picture and tag me on Instagram.
  • Let me know what questions you have or what you think at hello@krisplachy.com
  • Follow me on Instagram and send me a DM.
  • I’d be honored, if you find this podcast of value, if you would write a review. Then DM me on Instagram or Facebook or email me at hello@krisplachy.com and let me know it was you. Then we’ll send you my favorite books list!

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Podcast Transcript

Hey, I’m Kris Plachy, host of the Lead Your Team podcast. Running a million dollar business is not easy. And whether you’re just getting started with building your team, or you’ve been at this for a while, I’m going to bring you honest, specific, and clear practices you can use right now, today, to improve how well you lead your team. Let’s go ahead and get started.

Hello. Hello. How are you? Happy couple days after Thanksgiving, for everyone in the US. I hope that you were safe and had a lovely time. I know it’s just a weird year. We had a really weird holiday. Anyway, this is also the first podcast I’m recording since my surgery. And I just wanted to thank everybody for the well wishes. I’m fine. I feel great. Still a little slow to get going, but I expect that to be normal. I’m just about four weeks out. So I’m feeling really good and very happy to have everything behind me.

And I’m also, as I was prior to having the surgery, when I made the recording about when a founder has an unexpected personal issue, I’m just so proud to say that my business didn’t miss a beat. I have amazing team members and colleagues and partners who just over-delivered, as I would have expected them to. And I’m very grateful and it just feels a little bit like magic, is what I just keep telling people. So I’m thrilled to say that that was all good news. So thank you again.

So here we sit, as we sort of embark on the end of 2020. And I wanted to do a podcast for you about something that I hear founders say a lot of the time. Things that I hear my clients say all the time is, “I’m just not good at managing people.” And then that becomes a real reason for you to avoid it, abdicate it, feel like an imposter, and feel constantly inadequate and incapable or even angry and resentful. And that thought, “I’m just not good at managing people.” That’s what that is. It is a thought.

Now you might have a lot of evidence. You might have a lot of experience in a lot of circumstances that have happened that you’re using as evidence that prove your point, that verify that, yeah, you’re terrible at managing people. But I want to hold space, at least in this discussion, that maybe that’s not true. Maybe you’re not terrible at managing people. Maybe you just don’t know how. And more importantly, what I believe to be true is maybe you haven’t found your voice.

The thing about what I do in the How to CEO program and what I do with my private clients is I understand and I teach my clients the fundamentals of leading, managing, and coaching other people. I believe that there are these core fundamentals. If you listen to this podcast, you’ve really started to know what they are. If you work with me, we’ll really get that totally tied down for you.

But how you apply those fundamentals is yours. And I think that’s incredibly powerful and meaningful for you to know. That you don’t have to change who you are to be good at managing people. I think you just have to learn the foundations of doing it. And I want you to think about anything that you didn’t know how to do that you learned how to do. And I would venture that’s even true for whatever business you have. I have clients who are stylists, florists, retail shop owners, veterinarians, doctors, start-up-ineers, technologists. I have people who have massage spa facilities and experiences, preschools, daycares, furniture, design. I mean, you name it.

And those women didn’t know how to do the thing that they do now, before they learned how to do it. Right? You don’t know how to do hair until you learn how to do hair. You might be interested in hair. You don’t know how to be a physical therapist before you’re a physical therapist. You just might have an interest in the body and helping making people feel better.

So I think what happens is you start with this … Well, I know what happens is you start with whatever your learning is, your training, your experience, with that thing that you develop an interest in and skill in, and then you build a business around it. And you never decided to be a manager. Unlike more corporate focus professionals. They go in as an individual contributor, as an accountant, or a sales rep, or customer service rep or something. And they start to eye that management role, because that means a promotion and more salary and all that. But as a founder, you don’t have that same career path. Right? You just start your business. You start doing the thing you do. And you have more people than just you can handle. And then you add people and now you have to manage people. And that’s a normal progression.

So I think instead of saying, “I’m just not good at managing people.” First, we just say the truth. “I never wanted to manage people. I don’t enjoy managing people. It’s not fun to be someone’s manager. I don’t like that adults need to be managed.” Any way, shape or form of that type of experience, I think we start there. And I think that’s much more honest than, “I’m just not good at managing people.” Because if you’re like any of the women I work with, I know that you can learn. And what I believe is also true is we have to find the place that you can sit, figuratively, in that manager, management, leader seat, that affords you the opportunity to invest in learning some of the things you need to learn and finding a voice in it that you can keep and feel good about.

And I will tell you that I’ve had many clients, who once they learn the mechanics of managing people, they don’t mind it. It just doesn’t seem as stressful anymore. I can also tell you, as someone who’s been managing people for well over 25 years, that despite how much I know about it, I still have days where I’m like, “Really? Really? Did that really happen with someone on my team? Oh my heavens.” Right?

So to believe that you’ll never experienced a challenge again is also a lie. Just like you still face challenges if you treat patients, or customers, or dogs, or technology, you still have challenges. But that doesn’t make you throw up your hands and say, “I’m just not good at this.”

Instead typically, in those circumstances, we lean in. Right? Like, “Ooh, let’s solve this.” But for some reason, when it comes to managing, we just throw up our hands in disgusting and frustration and overwhelm. And say, “I can’t deal with this.”

What if you could? What if you could totally deal with it? What if it’s just because you’re missing a little bit of information and processes and you need a little support? You need to know that you’re not the only one. That there are ways to address the difficult employee that you don’t know what to deal with. The long-term employee who just doesn’t perform anymore. The person who doesn’t really have a job description but they’re really nice and they’ve worked with you a long time and you really like them, but you’re not really sure that they suit the company anymore. Right? Maybe you don’t know what to do with the person who is really, really helpful. And they always seem to not have enough to do. Maybe there’s someone who gossips all the time. You don’t know what to do with them. Is it time to hire a manager? How do I know? Right? Those are the beginnings of questions that you ask when you don’t fulfill them with an answer that perpetuates your lack of confidence. And everything I just said and more has an answer. Really.

So I want to invite you, when you sit there with your head in your hands, and you’re saying, “I’m just not good at managing people,” to remember my voice that says, “But what if you could be? What if you could learn?” I’m willing to bet you’ve learned how to do other hard things in your life, sometimes when you wanted to, sometimes when you didn’t. Because I know when you learn how to manage and coach and lead, a couple things will happen. You will feel less stressed. You will feel more proud. You will feel less guilt. You will feel more freedom and you will make more money and your business will make more money and you’ll contribute more to other people making more money. And I think that’s super fun.

So managing people doesn’t have to be hard. Learning how can be a little tough. But tough is worth it for what’s on the other side. And I always just want to remind you that it’s not rocket science. It’s a little bit of processes, steps to follow, combined with a little bit of courage, combined with some validation and some support. And you get it and you move and you take action, make decisions. You say things that you haven’t said before. And it’s amazing what can happen in your business as soon as you start to really, really decide to own that you’re managing the team.

And here’s the last little bit of ray of sunshine or hope that I will give you. I’ve had several clients who have done all that with me. In fact, I’m just wrapping up with someone that I’ve worked with for a year privately. And she has decided that she’s handles everything on our team. No problem. It’s fun, frankly, to watch her handle it. And she said to me, “I don’t think I want to be the CEO of my business. I think I want to really be in that founder role and hire a CEO to manage it.” And I said, “Yes, I think it’s time.”

So you don’t have to do it forever. You always will manage someone. So you can’t get away from it. Even if you love the owner founder seat, you’re going to have to manage a CEO. So you’ve got to go through the process to learn so that no one’s pulling wool over your eyes. There’s no conversation you will shy away from or back down off of. That you will make decisions. That you will lead. And you will learn how to coach and manage people. And if you’ve done that, and then you decide, “Okay, I’m going to get somebody in here who’s going to handle the day-to-day management of my company.” Let’s do it that too. Because that’s a great goal, but you’ve got to do it yourself first. It’s just the rule. Kris Plachy rule 722. Or maybe rule number one. Don’t hire other people to manage your team until you know how to do it. Every CEO needs to know how to hire, how to train, onboard, coach and how to fire. You learn those superpowers; you can handle anything when it comes to your team. Okay?

So give it a shot. Don’t invest in that thought anymore, if you have it. I don’t want you to feel so badly. I want you to feel good. I want you to be excited and proud of what you’ve built and what you continue to build. And I know that if you get those skills, I know it can change everything.

So I do feel like this has been a little bit of a long infomercial for the How to CEO program. That wasn’t my intention. I’m really trying mostly just to prop you up and help you know that as you go into 2021, I know this year has been … It doesn’t matter what industry you’re in. I was just talking with an FNP last week who started one of those drip hydration clinics. Which is an amazing idea if you ask me. And that industry has exploded this year. So in the time of this pandemic, we’ve had some industries very impacted negatively, people barely hanging on. And then we’ve had other industries that have absolutely tripled in size so quickly they are not prepared for that either. So this year has really, really been a test for every single person listening to this podcast, outside of, not even including the personal challenges that people have faced. And unfortunately, even the illnesses people have faced.

So I want to help you moving into 2021 with knowing that you can solve this part. You don’t need to keep fondling and struggling with managing the team. So there’s a couple of things I want you to know. The first thing is we have our next, How to CEO scheduled. It’s starting on January 20th. It’s a Wednesday. The classes will be meeting once a week at 11:00 on Wednesdays. I’ve had people ask me, “What’s a group size. How many people are in this?” We keep this relatively small. We’re not talking about thousands of people, you guys. These are no more than 50. I know every single person in this program. Right now, I think we have 45 and I know everybody and I love it. And I love knowing everything I know about everybody’s business. And we work together for 12 weeks. So we really, really dig in there, which is fun.

We will meet every Wednesday and then there will be office hour coaching sessions that are available for you to log into. And those are usually much smaller groups and can answer your very specific questions and coach you directly on the challenges that you’re having, either with the current content for that week that we’re going over, or even something else that’s going on in your business.

What we’re doing this time is we are offering early registration for people who want to register before the end of the year. If you are like me, my accountant, she’ll look and she’ll say, “We might want to spend a little more money before we get to the end of the year.” So we’re doing it for that. And also because it just helps us with having a good sense of how many notebooks we want to order and so forth. So we are doing an early registration right now. If you register before the end of December, so by December 31st, you will obviously be registered for the How to CEO and guarantee your spot starting on the 20th. You will also be getting a bonus course that we will release to you immediately called Managing Overwhelm for Female Entrepreneurs. I know you will find it really fascinating how I approach overwhelm and why so many women suffer from this. I really think I figured it out. And I also believe I give you some really powerful ways to think about and move yourself out of it. So that you would get right away once you register.

And then we’re also going to do a really cool mini virtual retreat with me on January 2nd, that will be all about planning 2021. And again, that will only be available to How to CEO clients. That will be a live virtual retreat with me. It will be recorded if you can’t make it, but you will only have access to that if you register for the How to CEO program by the end of December.

And the last thing I’ll say is if you don’t really love the group thing, which there are people who don’t and I completely understand that, and you prefer private, confidential, personal advisory support, I do that. Allie Brown, who is a client colleague of mine, she calls it like, “Having you on the bat phone.” And it really is more like that when we work together privately. So that I only work with a few people at a time. And in December, I have two openings for private clients. And I also am going to do two virtual strategy afternoons, if you would like to work with me for four hours. Again, we’re doing those virtually and we’re doing those in December.

So if that’s where you are, and you just want to really do a deep dive into your business, just for an afternoon, or if you’d like to work with me for three months privately, you can just go to KrisPlachy.com/appointment. And you can schedule time to meet with my team and they’ll go over what you’re looking for and we’ll see if it makes sense for us to work together. And if you’re ready to get started in the How to CEO program go to HowtoCEOjoin.com and join the wait list. And then you’ll get all the details on getting started with us. Okay?

So a little bit more information but we do have a lot going on as we close out the year. I have a lot of hope for us in 2021. And just as I have been in 2020, I am all in with you on 2021. We’re going to rally and we’re going to blow it off the rails. What do we say there? Blow it out of the woodwork. And assuming that we can get life going again, I will be doing a retreat in Hawaii in 2021. And you have to be a client to be invited to that also. Just putting that out there. So cheers to you. Thank you again for the support. Make it a great day and let’s plan for an amazing year. Talk to you again soon.

One more thing before you go. In a world of digital courses and online content, I like to work with my clients live. Because I know that when you have someone you can work with, ask questions of, and meet with, you’re so much more likely to get the success that you want. So head on over to HowtoCEOlive.com to learn more about our very exciting, very exclusive program just for female entrepreneurs. We’ll see you there.

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